Treasures Hidden in Plain Sight

Last November I was struck by a car as I was crossed a busy street. I ended up with a broken right wrist (I am right-handed) and some bruises; and at a deeper level struggling with the trauma to both my body and psyche. I realized it could have been much worse and I was grateful for God’s care of me – but that did not alleviate the suffering inside or out.

My regular prayer routine and rhythm seemed to abandon me and I found myself feeling isolated and disconnected from life in general. Hoping to somehow reconnect I returned to my on-line Mazenodian Spirituality course. That was on the day when we were being introduced to the 2016 Edition of the Oblate Prayer Book.

I had a copy of the 1998 edition hidden away somewhere in my room and I remember looking at it once but I found the print to be too small. And even though we had all been sent an electronic copy of the updated 2016 edition – well it was expensive to print and so it remained unopened in my electronic filing cabinet. I wonder why I made so many excuses not to just open it and discover the treasures it was holding.

And so with my arm in a cast which sat atop a pillow on the corner of my desk I listened to the video and became entranced.  I kept hitting the pause button and replaying it in an effort to catch each word, each phrase – wanting to make them mine.

Morning Prayer to the Blessed Trinity – “Blessed be the Holy Trinity now and forever. I adore you, my God…” Oh how I had longed to pray like that; the words were a precious delight to my wounded psyche and I found my heart opening wider with each word.

“Unable of myself, Eternal Father, to honor you worthily, I offer you the praise of your Word from all eternity…” Savouring each syllable, tasting and asking God to help me to make them mine.

Adoration – “Eternal Father, I adore you as my Creator… Eternal Word, I adore you as my Redeemer… Holy Spirit of God, I adore you as my Sanctifier…” The words themselves seducing and dancing within me, promising me delight.  These were the prayers of Eugene while he was at the Sulpician Seminary.  How lovely, how apt I told myself, for several times I had referred to these courses as my own “Sulpician” experience.

Thanksgiving – “Eternal Father, I thank you for creating me with so much love, for your great fidelity and forgiveness in caring for me in the midst of my sins… Son of God, I thank you for having saved me by the toils of your life and your sufferings unto death… Holy Spirit of God, I thank you for offering me so many graces… Words giving expression to my heart.

Sorrow – “Eternal Father, forgive my misuse of the life you have given me… Son of God, I ask your pardon for having derived so little benefit from the example of your life… Holy Spirit of God, forgive me my neglect of your light and inspirations…” A vital part of my morning prayer.  I am reminded for some reason of the “Lord’s Prayer”, how all areas of my life are brought to the table as a delicate offering.

Offering – “Eternal Father, I offer you whatever I shall do this day and renounce all search for selfish satisfaction… Eternal Word, I offer you all my thoughts and words this day… Spirit of God, to you I consecrate all the affections of my heart… Eternal Father, let me seek the fullness of your perfection. Son of God, let me walk only in your light. Holy Spirit of God, fill me with the wisdom of your love.”

What a gift to receive! Some mornings I find my entire being offering the prayers while at other times I seem capable only of ‘reading the words’ – with only my fidelity to offer my Beloved. Always though I receive the small consolation of knowing that I am not alone, that I am praying as part of a greater community.  Being connected to and able to pray with my Mazenodian Family – it is like being embraced and held.

I look forward to slowly discovering all the riches of the Oblate Prayer Book. Treasures hidden in plain sight.

By Eleanor Rabnett – Provincial Associate